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Existential Excavation


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Life is full of questions, all day every day: what to eat, where to go, what to watch, who to listen to, what to buy, what to believe. 

In my experience, there are three types of questions.

First are the trivial questions; the ones that have no impact whether they are answered correctly, or at all. Like spam email and that stuff in the garage you never touch, they are best discarded. They are only taking up space. These are questions such as, “Which candy bar should I buy?” and “What show should I watch tonight?”

Who cares? Pick one and move on. Or pick none.

Second are the important questions. They are decisions in the present that lead to future actions of great consequence. This category includes questions like, “What degree should I earn?” Who should I choose for a life partner?” “How best to manage my money?”

These questions deserve careful analysis and critical thought. Make your most informed decisions, and know you will be completely wrong 50% of the time. At least.

The third question is its own category; a singular entry. It is The One Question.

This question is raised only once, but should be revisited often. It is the Mother question; the question that gives rise to all other questions. When answered correctly, this question informs every thought and action for the rest of your life.

The One Question is always the same, yet its answer is continually in flux; hence the need to reassess and re-evaluate your answer on a regular basis.

Once upon a time, you were not Here.

Then, without explanation (for, indeed, there is no rational explanation), you were. Here, that is. From the moment you arrived Here, you had needs and desires. As you grew, you developed influence and agency; you could make things happen Here.

Now, these words that originated in my brain are making their way into your brain in an attempt to call your attention to The One Question.

It makes no difference to me, how you answer your One Question, and I couldn’t pretend to be able to answer it for you. But it is the most important question of all, and you should give it your full consideration. The answer to your One Question will literally create the rest of your existence Here. As mine does for me.

Here’s the situation that brings the One Question into existence, and gives it its power. Or, more correctly, gives you the power to answer it:

Before you were Here, you were not Here. You don’t know where you were, prior to coming Here; you have no idea why you are Here, and you didn’t ask to be Here. And you have no idea where you will be when—once again—you are no longer Here.

But Here you are.

Follow me now. The fact that you didn’t ask to be Here and have no answers as to why you are Here, or for how long, means precisely this:

 You don’t owe anyone anything.

Give your parents and caretakers exactly as much respect as you feel they are due, based upon how they care (or cared) for you. You didn’t ask for them to create you and therefore no boon is due them.

Look cautiously askance upon the advice offered to (or forced upon) you from “authority” figures. They have no authority over you—once you are of the age of majority as determined by your tribe—other than that which you choose of your own volition to give them.

I’m not suggesting that you ignore everyone and everything, only that you evaluate your decisions and actions in light of your own best reasoning and critical thinking.

Your noncomplicity in the fact you are Here grants you the freedom to do exactly whatever the hell you see fit. Your existence—as incredible and wonderful and tragic as it is—doesn’t mean you are indebted to any man or deity, in any way.

You are absolutely and irrevocably free to do anything that the limits of your physicality will permit.

Be who you want, with whom you want, howsoever you want.

But know that great and terrible freedom brings with it great and terrible responsibility.

It is true that you need take no one’s counsel on how best to live your life. It is also true that there is no one who can counsel you on how to live your life. In this, you are alone.

There is a positive relationship between the freedom you assert and the existential loneliness you assume.

Read that again, slowly.

I’m not saying that a competent, independent person can have no friends. I’m emphasizing the reality that no one is coming to save you.

When you choose an authentic, narrow path, it is up to you to be sure you don’t fall off the mountain.

So, in your sovereign freedom, what will you do with this life you have so mysteriously inherited and inhabited? Not in granular terms of the myriad decisions and experiences along the way, but taken as the totality of your life; the continuous arc of your time Here, from start to finish.

It’s really not as complex as it first appears. For an existentially enlightened being, there really is only One Question:

In a world where you can choose to be anything, what will you be?

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My novel, The Calling is available now in print and as an eBook.


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To learn more about how to use these concepts or to inquire about working with me, go to the Jeff W Welsh website, subscribe to my Substack or Medium accounts or the Hardcore Happiness blog page, and follow my Instagram account for daily insights.




- JWW